Dec 9, 2012


People have funny ideas of where miscarriages come from.  A "misconception", if you will.  I suppose it is the natural way of humans to try to assign blame for a bad outcome.  It's difficult to accept that sometimes things just happen, and we can't control them.  Whenever I counsel someone for a miscarriage, I always say that "this is not from anything that you did or did not do.  You didn't cause this."  My personal philosophy is that it is quite amazing that any pregnancy succeeds, given the complexity of things, and it's not surprising that things sometimes don't go right.  And it always breaks my heart a little when I have a woman convinced that y or z made her miscarry.  Here are a few of the things I have reassured women about:

I drank too much chamomile tea, and it made me miscarry.

I spent too long in the hot tub.  Did it cook my baby?

It's a punishment from God.

It's because my pap was abnormal from herpes (All kinds of wrong here.  Paps are not abnormal from herpes).

I ate the wrong food. 

It came out when I went in a bounce house.

I had a massage, and it caused me to start to cramp and miscarry.

I had sex.

The cat licked my belly.

To my patients and women everywhere- I hope that your doctors, and myself, continue to assure you that this is not your fault.  It happens to about half of women.  Please try to not blame yourselves. 

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