This duality is something I haven't learned to balance yet. It can be hard both ways: for a doctor-daughter to be a family member while entrusting her parents' care to other people, and for a daughter-doctor experiencing human grief whilst being expected to care for and relay medical information to the rest of the family.
My dear friend lost her young fiance last weekend, after he collapsed during a half marathon. She said he had a massive brain hemorrhage. My friend heart breaks for her, while my doctor-friend mind wonders if he had an arteriovenous malformation, if the increased heart rate and blood pressure probably triggered the rupture of the aneurysm. There is no separation between these two thought processes for me.
So, I am learning to manage this new addition to myself. It is easier to go to the hospital and just flip through the chart, rather than pestering a relative for information that they don't have. On the other hand, if I find something abnormal, I feel compelled to do something about it, and maybe miss out on the richness of caring for someone simply as their granddaughter, their friend. It's hard as a doctor to trust the care of someone you love to another doctor. But you have to, otherwise you'll be exhausted of patients before you even step foot in your own office.